2 Much Is 2 Much

Usually I wait until I have finished a book before I recommend it to my friends - but I knew from the moment that Baxter put it in my hands that this one was different. Yesterday, we were very late for the new Sunday School class we were going to visit. I don't know about you, but I can't stand being late - especially the first time you attend something. I already knew that our joining this class would require quite a few hand shakes and introductions and that would take a little time. I also know how annoying it is when people crash in right in the middle of something and interrupt your mojo. Anyway, we ended up going to the church library to kill a little time before the church service started. We have used the library before; but mostly for kids books and devotional stuff. That's what I was actually going to look for - a devotional book for me to share with Abby and maybe something for myself to read in the mornings before the kids get up. As I crouched by the children's section, Baxter came over and plopped something in front of my face that I have never seen or heard of. Aptly titled, Too Much of a Good Thing: Raising Children of Character in an Indulgent Age, by Dan Kindlon, PhD - this book immediately struck me. It is a theme that continuously comes up in mommy circles and parenting columns - can there be too much of a good thing? Do our kids have too many things? What makes our kids truly happy? How do we parent our children in a different way from our parents while maintaining authority and control? Kindlon is the co-author of Raising Cain, the best-seller focused on raising boys in today's culture and the subject of a much talked about PBS miniseries. That book has been on my reading list for some time and although it was right next to this one, Too Much of a Good Thing seemed right for me to read right now. I'm up to page 100 and counting. I should probably finish it tonight or tomorrow but I wanted to go ahead and share with anyone reading my blog just how insightful and compelling this book is. I see so much of the way I was raised in it. I see my husband's parents as well as friend's parents, parents of Abby's friends and, sadly, myself. If you are a parent and you have concerns about the state of America's children - unable to take responsibility for their own actions with no sense of accountability, prone to drug and alcohol abuse, no concrete sense of values and ethics and an overwhelming sense of apathy, sadness and self-loathing - then this is the book that makes sense of it all. It has opened my eyes to the complacency I have let creep into my own home and it has also affirmed my belief in the importance of certain things in our life that I believe we are doing well. I will probably post again when I finish it and have taken it all in. Meanwhile, if you have read this far, share your own feelings about the excess our children are surrounded with. Do you have rules in your home about the TV? Computer? Limits on what you will spend on toys? Have your children ever wanted for anything? I'm just curious as to how other parents feel our consumerism is effecting our kids. I heard Abby playing this morning and her dialogue went something like this, "when we have a better house, we can get more stuff for it!" and I am left feeling a little sick to my stomach.