Spring Possibilities

I love spring so much. I have been impatiently awaiting its arrival and it feels like it's finally here. After several days of fun in the sun, we are being blessed with a thunderstorm...right on time. I planted grass seed in the front yard, wildflower seeds in my front beds, and peas, lettuce, carrots, and swiss chard in our new vegetable patch. They will really appreciate the rain today.

Once in a while, I still think about my dad. I'll be thumbing through a stack of pictures, looking for something and am almost overwhelmed at the sheer number of photos that he made while he was alive. 95% of the pictures I have of my children were made by my dad and they have his style - the way he loved to capture them looking at each other, or sweaty curls sticking to their heads in the summertime, or smiling from ear to ear. Yesterday, while cleaning up the yard, I found myself with a rake in my hands and I missed him. I didn't get really emotional, I just missed him and I wished there were some way I could still tell him that I love him and how grateful I am to him for all he has done for me.

I think he would like what we did with the bathroom. I think he would love to see the yard this year - and the house painted again. He'd like the fact that my car is cleaned out. He'd love to hear that I've had another copy writing offer which may turn out to be incredible for me professionally. He'd love to see my mom and I so close, hugging each other through it all. He would love the strength and quiet mourning of my brother. He would have laughed at me quite a few times over the last few months. I am looking forward to the spring - not just for house painting and plant tending - but for the healing that will continue through this next season. Each season will bring with it new tears and new happiness. That is the definition of joy, isn't it? What real joy have you ever experienced that didn't include a few tears as well? If it was really wonderful, it probably brought you to your knees. The birth of a child, the wedding to your best friend, a lifetime of memories...they are all so hard to hold on to. Spring has rain and we have tears, both are necessary to the growth that God intended.